“You only have control over three things in your life – the thoughts you think, the images you visualize, and the actions you take (your behavior). How you use these three things determines everything you experience.”


The journey of taking charge of your own life and directing it begins with taking charge of your own mind and directing your thoughts.

Taking control of your life is becoming responsible for every aspect of your life. It is controlling your thoughts, feelings, words, and behavior to produce the results you desire.

When you lose a sense of control of your life you lose out to negative emotions and where negative emotions thrives happiness drives out.

The offshoot of blame indicates the root of anger and the root of anger signals danger to both the body and the mind.

Consequently, the anger diminishes and demolishes success. Anger weakens the body immune system and makes it vulnerable to diseases.

When you get active in the blame game you activate negative emotions especially anger. Excuses only excruciate the pain of failure and debilitate success chances.  

Possibilities open up to you when you take personal responsibility for your life.

Until you take personal responsibility for your life you lose control over your life.

The more responsibility you take in each area of your life, the greater will be your sense of control over your life; the greater the sense of control you have over your life the more positive you feel about yourself and your life; the more positive you feel about yourself and your life the more you will make better choices and decisions that produces success in each area of your life.


The more irresponsible you are the more you lose control over your life and the less freedom you possess.

Responsibility empowers you with positive emotions. Irresponsibility leads to the breakout of negative emotions.

Cut off every unfinished business from the past and let it go. Never permit what others did to you to control your emotional life.

Permitting the actions or inaction of others control your life indicates you need something from them probably love, respect or compensation for the hurt they caused you. Let go of your right to be needy.

Most likely the people who had hurt you may not really have the capacity to give you the love, respect or the compensation you need – remember, hurting people hurt other people; or they may not really care; worst still they may not even be aware that they have in any way hurt your feelings.

Forgive and let it go.

Channel your energies into creating the future you want to lead by taking responsibility for your peace of mind and well-being rather than permitting the past to poison the present and perpetuate into the future.



Timeless Gem

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About the Author


Udeme Archibong is a prolific writer, an astute communicator and a model of excellence. Her writings have made profound impact on thousands of lives around the world through her blog:, which has followings in over 70 countries in continents of the world.

She is a Self-Development Expert, who passionately works towards helping people maximize their destinies.

At some point, she was a motivational columnist, writing Success Recipe and Destiny Catalyst, for two Nigerian national newspapers, Vanguard and ThisDay, respectively. She is the initiator of the Revolution Series Seminars