BREAKING BAD HABITS
“The best way to stop a bad habit is never to begin it.”
-J. C. PENNEY
The words of J. C. Penny holds true, “The best way to stop a bad habit is never to begin it.”
Initial actions create addictive actions.Never start what you do not want to experience its end result because what you start can kick-start a habit that keeps you in bondage which bonds you to a failing life.
Before we deal out rightly with breaking bad habits, let’s focus on first things first in order to gain a deeper understanding and insight.
Many of the habits manifested in adulthood were acquired from childhood. Research has shown that 60 to 65 percent of a child’s working vocabulary is acquired by the age of three; 80 percent of a child’s character is formed by age five, and 90 percent of a child’s personality is formed by age seven.
THE DEARTH OF ROLE MODELS
Son, your children more attention pay, to what you do than what you say, and if you set the example you will not have to set the rules.
The span of a child’s formative years is the most vulnerable and delicate stage of his or her life.
Children largely inculcate the attitude and character displayed by their parents. If their parents have showered them with unconditional love, encouragement and discipline as they grow into adulthood, they will naturally be givers of unconditional love to others and develop great habits.
Our behaviors are motivated by the need for love or to compensate for lack of love. In other words, a child who is shown performance-based love or no love at all will most likely grow into adulthood with dysfunctional personality who has inculcated bad habits as a youngster. Many of the bad habits are rooted in emotional decisions or the need for emotional acceptance.
This emotional insecurity is a product of a poor self-image or a low self-esteem.And a youngster with a poor self-image or low self-esteem will easily and readily “catch” bad habits from peer group pressure because he or she desperately wants to “belong” or to be accepted or “loved” by peer group in which for the most part are negative influences.
Furthermore, they will bring with them baggage of bad or negative habits and invade every area of their lives and relationships which jeopardizes their success in life.
There exist societal issues whereby the older generation often looks upon the younger generation with an accusation that they are immoral and irresponsible.
However, I want to pose a question: whose kids are they? Remember, the offspring is a replica of its roots. If irresponsible and immoral adults or parents produce irresponsible and immoral kids, why lay all the blame on the kids?
I once lived next to a neighbor who violently beat up his wife and literally stripped her naked in front of their kids. No one can fathom the negative impact the scene had on the children’s subconscious minds as they grew into adulthood especially, if they kids did not reprogram their subconscious minds in order to live a better life.
It has been ascertained that for the most part children who grew up in dysfunctional or abusive homes will also grow into adulthood to have dysfunctional or abusive homes and this passes on from generation to generation unless someone becomes a transition parent and stems the tide and initiates the ride to a new beginning of generational pattern by his or her life transformation.
High self-esteem parents will most likely raise high self-esteem children and low self-esteem parents will most likely raise low self-esteem children.
Adults break the traffic laws yet expect their children not to break the laws of the land or the laws of life. Adults smoke, drink liquor, engage in illegalities, and are unfaithful to their spouses; but they expect their children not to be drug addicts, alcohol addicts, dubious, or promiscuous. Parents backbite in front of their children, they lie and harbor grudges; yet they expect their children to have great minds. This is an illusion. We cannot reap what we have not sown.
Drinking parlors, media that televises or publishes obscenities, and brothels—all of these types of establishments are owned by adults, not teenagers or youngsters. Many men who patronize prostitutes are husbands and fathers.
If we want to put a stop to youth restiveness, the older generation must be accountable for their actions and inaction, and lead an exemplary life of nobility.While we may make mistakes but we must self-examine; acknowledge and self-correct our mistakes and get better every day and in every way. Self-improvement is the key.
The key is not about becoming a perfect role model even though we should aim for and press or grow towards perfection as long as we live but rather the key is becoming an inspiring role model.
Jesus Christ remains the perfect role-model for mankind.In doing so, the older generation will become a positive influence, shaping the lives and destinies of the younger generation.
Remember, as a parent it is what you leave in your children rather than what you leave for your children is what counts and which will also count for good or ill to the destinies of your children
THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU
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About the Author
Udeme Archibong is a prolific writer, an astute communicator and a model of excellence. Her writings have made profound impact on thousands of lives around the world through her blog: successrecipeblog.com, which has followings in over 70 countries in continents of the world.
She is a Self-Development Expert, who passionately works towards helping people maximize their destinies.
At some point, she was a motivational columnist, writing Success Recipe and Destiny Catalyst, for two Nigerian national newspapers, Vanguard and ThisDay, respectively. She is the initiator of the Revolution Series Seminars