The fear of criticism is the ally to the fear of rejection. The fear of criticism is the internalization of flaws, weaknesses and faults that others have suggested to us; whether real or imagined as a form of approval or rejection of us.

We live in a negative society where many people easily recognize weaknesses rather than strengths; they become fault-finders rather than good-finders. Many people easily attach labels that are degrading to the identity of individuals. They attempt to belittle or run down the self-esteem of another. Parents are not left out in this societal malady. In fact, parents are foundational culprits in the society, as many of them criticize and degrade the self-esteem of their children knowingly or unknowing, making them grow into adulthood full of insecurities and lacking in confidence. Employers and bosses are inclusive in this degrading menace. With this popular trend running across every sphere of society, the fear of criticism has deterred many people of self-expression and has crippled the will to live their dreams.

Initiative and imagination becomes impotent in the presence of the fear of criticism. Criticism builds up fear or resentment within and it damages self-esteem. Constructive suggestion makes for improved performance and boosts self-esteem.


The question is: How do you respond to criticism? When there is a taste of bitterness within, every criticism becomes distasteful. Your response will determine if you will give expression to your individuality and live your dreams or if you will settle for the status quo and become a miniature of what you were created to be.

Living your dreams is facing your fear of criticism with honesty, love and forgiveness. If you want to be somebody; to do something great and become a voice that counts in the world, you will surely attract critics.

There are two kinds of criticism; constructive criticism and destructive criticism. Whenever you are criticized be honest with yourself and examine the criticism to identify any element of truth in it. Get the truth and self-correct yourself and become better. However, when the criticism is destructive or unjustified embedded in falsehood, then discard it; never get in the garbage but rather forget the garbage. Forgive and let go of your offender and move on. Never waste your time to respond to your critics or defend yourself.

Remember, you have no time to lose to your critics but rather you only have the time to use up in living your dreams and making a mark in the world.

  • Have the esteem to examine the criticism and who is giving it and their motive.
  • If there is an element of truth in the criticism, use it to become better.
  • If the criticism is founded on falsehood, discard it, let go of the offense and the offender and move on.
  • Never waste time answering critics or defending yourself; choose wisely the battles you fight in order to guard your focus in accomplishing your destiny.


Timeless Gem

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About the Author


Udeme Archibong is a prolific writer, an astute communicator and a model of excellence. Her writings have made profound impact on thousands of lives around the world through her blog:, which has followings in over 70 countries in continents of the world.

She is a Self-Development Expert, who passionately works towards helping people maximize their destinies.

At some point, she was a motivational columnist, writing Success Recipe and Destiny Catalyst, for two Nigerian national newspapers, Vanguard and ThisDay, respectively. She is the initiator of the Revolution Series Seminars